Marriage-and its definition-has been the ultimate source of bloggernacle fodder for months now. The national elections this year bring with them a tough call for citizens local to the state of California and whether or not they vote to redefine marriage to include the marriages of men to men and women to women.
That issue has been a frustrating one for all Latter-day Saints, because on the one hand we are commanded to love all of our brothers and sisters, and on the other, we are commanded to love God first. Some people cannot seem to grasp how to do both, and it has been interesting and horrifying to see so many of them when faced with choosing between the two, choose mankind rather than God.
So this matter has been on my mind and in my heart and prayers and it has been absolutely futile for anyone on the “God” side, to try and help those who are solidly on the “mankind” side understand the importance of what is happening, and I’m sure vice versa from the “mankind” side’s point of view. It was tucked in the back of my brain when I casually read through a blog I sometimes frequent and came upon a thread titled “Evil Speaking” by Nate Oman. In it, he offers the analogy of “marriage” and tries to tie it to the idea that we (as Church members) are the “bride of Christ” and if so, then we need to be more respectful of our betrothed spouse-the Savior. As I read through the replies to his thread, something kept setting off the “EGO” alert but I could see their points and wasn’t sure exactly WHY I was getting that signal.
As usual, my most introspective and creative and probably “able to be influenced for good” moments of the day came just as I was waking up and getting ready for the day. In these precious early morning moments, my mind is a blank and inviting canvas for the Lord unless I have some kind of self-imposed agenda already written there. My mind drifts in the shower and I seem to get flashes of brilliance and “spirit” in those soothing minutes before the kids, life, marriage, motherhood, church callings, and duty cave in and bury me for the day.
This morning as I asked God why some people just refuse to engage in the revelation process so they can KNOW, rather than think/feel/hope, Nate’s thread hit the station and my train of thought was off and running. When God whispered moments later, the insight was solid and bright and undeniable in it’s glorious simplicity and truth. WE (as in members of the church) are NOT “the bride”-we are the invited guests of the Groom, and we have set ourselves up on a pedestal of importance that does not belong to us yet. In thinking that “we” are already partners with Christ, or His betrothed, we presume to tell Him what to do, what to direct the Church to do, or act as if we have the right to criticize and argue with Him as many these days think a spouse has the right to do.
In reality we are NOT “sealed” to God yet, and as only invited guests, we are coming across as the meddling, nasty, busy bodied guests that almost every important event seems to attract. You know the ones…they PRETEND to be concerned about the bride and groom and offer advice “in their best interest”, when the truth is they actually think they are wiser and more capable than anyone else. They feel like others NEED to understand how inappropriate certain things are, such as – the decorations, the guest list, the food, the bride’s dress, the invitations etc. They personally know of a better caterer, band, location, and minister. If the other guests are REALLY lucky, these know-betters are even perfectly willing to tell you anything you want to know about the bride’s past, her family, her hobbies, her social views, and flaws. “That poor groom just has NO idea what she’s been doing while he’s been away!” “He’s lucky to have genuinely concerned and intelligent people like us around to make sure His best interests are protected.” “It’s obvious the Groom left His bride in less-than-capable hands!”
So, with that to chew on, I’m off to work on a post about ancient Hebrew marriage rituals and Jewish wedding traditions because MY OH MY…they are like brilliant fireworks against a black sky when pondered upon in relation to the above truths.
You know, it’s funny… When I read your title for this entry, it looked like both a line from “Princess Bride” and transcribed Hebrew (which I studied in college).
Well, I had to put your high-falutin’ theory to the test, so I went to LDS.org and combed through all the articles talking about the metaphor of bride, bridegroom and guests, and you k now what? You’re right.
But I distinctly remember checking off “chicken” on the RSVP.